Don't Hurt 'Em, ScHoolboy Q

A while back I labeled The Buff Nerds crew as possibly the hippest up-and-comers out of the West Coast. I stand by my original sentiment, but if/when the 'Nerds blow up, they're going to have to compete with the Black Hippies out of Los Angeles...undeniably the reigning Kings of the West, and still on the come-up themselves.Case in point: ScHoolboy Q's new video, which is the chillest thing I've seen or heard all summer.

Besides his sick music, another reason I love Q is his use of the "capital H" aesthetic. I don't know when rappers started to love capitalizing -- or not capitalizing -- certain letters in their names as part of their swag, but I think Kid Cudi -- or KiD CuDi -- is a big reason behind it. Now we've got RiFF RaFF with all lowercase vowels in his name and music video titles, as well as ScHoolboy with his "H's." I've been thinking of changing my electronic signature to b.dOylE...thoughts?

Back off, Carina Chocano!

About a week ago, Carina Chocano -- a "self-employed" sort of "freelance writer," if her LinkedIn is to be believed -- wrote a tad-too-touchy piece in the New York Times about Pinterest, Tumblr, and general user-generated content aggregation websites. Only she calls these websites "longing machines," and concludes with an ever-so-melancholy note that the sites define "the life we think we were meant to have but don’t, the people we think we should be but aren’t."

By extension of Chocano's theory, my time spent curating on "The Fancy" is a fruitless pathological pursuit to fool myself into thinking I'm a man of "taste" and "style."

Pshawww...act like you have this kind of taste, Carina.

Personally, I think Carina's essay is about as valid as any journalist cum philosopher can churn out when applying analytical skills learned in their college comparative literature classes to modern technology. RE: It's all wish-wash. Because you're right, Ms. Carina: "People don’t post stuff because they wish they owned it, but because they think they are it, and they long to be understood..." Sounds kind of like the supposedly intellectually untouchable Jonathan Franzen telling the Kenyon College Class of 2011 that the "telos of techne is to replace a natural world that’s indifferent to our wishes ... with a world so responsive to our wishes as to be, effectively, a mere extension of the self." Thanks for the advice, J. Franz! I'll be sure to avoid modern technology from now on!

Sure, people use online profiles -- even Pinterest portfolios consisting entirely of images -- to define how they want to be viewed by the world. But I think anyone who has ever viewed a Facebook profile filled with "deep" quotations and ostentatiously heart-felt status updates can see that these profiles act as more then just, y'know, profiles -- their an outlet for self-expression, self-realization and social understanding. So Ms. Chocano, I'm here to tell you: your behind the times, but not in your use of technology. Your antiquated in your realization that technology is deeply entwined with people's emotions and understanding of themselves. Heck, David Foster Wallace hit on the soul-churning isolating effect of technology in his 2005 Kenyon Commencement address. (On another note: those Kenyon College grads must really be a happy bunch...)

Basically, I find these overly-intellectual technology pieces at once embarrassing (for the writer) and confusing. What exactly does Carina want me to do, once I acknowledge that my "Fancy" portfolio is a web of self-deceit? Stop looking at "Vans California Era Washed Paisley" and "Cheesecake-stuffed strawberries?" Cuz if that's what you think I'll do, Ms. Chocano, then you don't know B.Doyle...

Damn those are sexy...

"The Dark Knight Rises" is Visual Dank Chronic

Some friends and I saw "The Dark Knight Rises" last night. That sh** is tightttttttttttt. Even with its grim, post-9/11 vision of NYC/Gotham, the movie still made me miss the good ol' US of A.

All we have over here is "Punjabi Batman"

After the negative experience at "The Amazing Spiderman," we opted for the regular screen over iMax -- even though Manohla Dargis' New York Times review insisted that iMax is "the way to see the film." Well, an Indian "regular" screen is pretty darn big as it turns out, so sucks to your suggestion, Ms. Dargis.

The movie also gave me my own visions of big screen glory -- a dream that is conveniently easy to manifest here in Mumbai, where a number of my associates and roommates are already "acting" (re: appearing in the background) of major Bollywood films and commercials. The pay is also not too shabby, considering your usually just asked to dance around or stare at the protagonist in awe...half-a-days work can net you a few thousand dollars rupees.

Now that's some free enterprise that even Bane could support!

Indian 1% Put the American 1% to Shame

Last weekend, driving through South Bombay after dinner, one of my friends pointed out the 27-story personal tower of Mukesh Ambani. He noted that the tower's amenities included several floors serving as car showrooms, and a massive ice skating rink serving as another floor. I think I may have muttered something then about "wasteful" or "insensitive," but what I meant to say was "Boss-status!" and then pretend I'm shooting a basketball, the international sign for "ballin'."

Because if there's one thing this country appreciates, it's tasteful moderation.

Of course, this is Mumbai, so right outside the tower there were decaying storefronts and a few beggars wandering around. Even in the relatively posh South Bombay, I took the little trappings of destitution to be par for the course. 

I was thus happy to see a fairly thoughtful breakdown of why India's nicest neighborhoods are, like, not really that nice in the Wall Street Journal today. Hint: It's not because the rich aren't rich enough. 

"The contrast between the popping champagne corks inside and the filth outside is striking. Again, the simple economics of incentives explains why. Many of the wealthy diners who frequent these establishments pull right up to the entrance, and so don't need to worry about the filth outside," writes Rupa Subramanya, referring to upscale restaurants in midtown Mumbai located in shoddy neighborhoods.

Basically, Subramanya contends that Mumbai's rich have no emotional stake in their neighborhoods, since it doesn't cost much to hire a 24/7 driver and roll through the fecal-filled streets in a tinted-window Escalade, sipping mineral water and breathing circulated air imported from the Himalayas. She argues that the Indian aristocrats take care of the public services that matter to them -- electricity, for instance -- and as long as the infrastructural absurdities of the outside world don't impede on their personal space, they feel no civic duty to demand improvements. Even if their "personal space" happens to be a 27-story mega-apartment.

Fair enough -- but I still don't think the article gets to the core of why Mumbai's wealthy don't demand infrastructural and design improvements to their neighborhoods at large. As Subramanya herself points out, in places like the U.S., there is a clear relationship between real estate quality and the quality of the surrounding sidewalks, parks, public schools, etc. If you were to build a mansion in the middle of the Bronx, for instance, you'd of course be hard-pressed to make a profit, because the poor quality of the surrounding houses and public services directly affects the value of the house. Expensive houses are in expensive neighborhoods, ipso facto.

In India, I would be very curious to see how "neighborhood quality" affects house valuation. The wealthy are of course "clustered" here as in other places -- it's not like you'll find a personal showroom in the middle of Dharavi. But still, if I built a 27-story tower for myself, I'd want to make damn sure my neighborhood is pristine, classy and ideally not near any shanty-towns. I don't know if it's a lack of civic duty, or if its just impossible to distance yourself from the poverty here, but I'd certainly like to find out.

On that note, any Indian billionaires want to hang out this weekend?

Frank Ocean...You Rule...

Frank Ocean...*sighhhhhhh* You first got my attention with Nostalgia, Ultra. More just the name and the mixtape cover...I wasn't really quite as much into the music at that point...but I could tell right away that you were a hip cat. Then I heard "Thinking About You." Arguably the theme song of senior year, my friend.

With "Channel Orange" -- currently everyone's go-to topic on Twitter -- it seems like you've really put yourself on the mainstream map. Or maybe I'm just overwhelmed by all the pre-album "coming-out-of-the-closet" buzz? A savvy move, to be sure...a decision that will surely move as many records as it has moved hearts.

Regardless, it's clear you're on your new-new with the album...this "Forrest Gump" song is my current shiznit.  I wouldn't have guessed I would ever like -- let alone love -- a song about man-on-man relationships. You are truly an innovator. Congratulations.